Week 1: Initial Assessment
Defining Objectives
What reflection and self-evaluation will the client engage in?
- Client will talk about his past experiences in dating, speaking specifically about challenges and successes he has experienced in this domain
- Client will feel supported and listened to while sharing his personal history with dating
- Client will begin to relate his challenges in dating have impacted his overall life satisfaction or contributed to his motivation for seeking treatment
- Client will know that there is hope for changing and improving in this domain and walk away from the session feeling a sense of trust in the process that he and his provider are developing
Taking Action
How will you facilitate reflection on past experiences in this domain?
- Provider will assess for the historical strengths and challenges that the client has faced when dating. Provider will affirm, summarize and engage in client-centered approaches
- Provider will promote a discussion around how challenges in dating connect back to the client’s overall motivations for seeking treatment or to the client’s stated overarching treatment goals
- Provider will be courageous, empathetic, but direct in their line of questioning, not being afraid to address potentially taboo or intimate subject areas
- Provider will outline what a potential 3 week course of treatment might look like by co-authoring interventions designed to address dating goals
- Provider will remain mindful that client might express goals with misogynistic undertones, or that the client may be explicit about their desire to exploit others for sex. Provider will be prepared to hear this perspective while also directing the client towards more ethical, legal, and ultimately more fulfilling interventions
| Questions to Consider | Resistant Client Corner |
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Invite the client to envision the end result - what does it look like in the context of his actual life when this skill is mastered or bolstered. Does he anticipate more life satisfaction? More confidence? Dating often requires a great deal more self-awareness and effort than young men have had to put forth in the past Add these tangible benefits into conversations around how the intervention relates back to higher level treatment goals |
When to Check In
While not as common an area for clients to come in hoping to address, challenges around dating and romantic relationships may emerge as an area where the client needs support as the relationship with his provider develops. This module provides a framework for delving deeper, but consider checking in with your supervisor if:
- The client exhibits strongly misogynistic attitudes towards women that do not budge in the face of guidance or intervention from the provider
- The client reports feeling forced to date despite not feeling ready or interested
- The client comes into sessions with any history of sexual trauma
Week 2: Trial & Error
Defining Objectives
What will the client work on this week to gain confidence in the dating world or build healthier romantic relationships?
- Client will continue to demonstrate trust in his provider by offering the provider examples of dating relationship challenges and will express openness towards working collaboratively with his provider to address these challenges
- Client will engage with their provider in behavioral change that addresses an identified skill deficit in dating or relationship development
- Client will continue to feel motivated to engage in this area of focus both in this session and moving forward
Taking Action
How will you facilitate the client’s efforts in this domain?
- Provider will engage in behavioral activation interventions that address the challenges that the client has reported
- Provider will continue to instill hope that these changes can improve the client’s fulfillment in this domain while connecting back to overarching treatment goals
- Provider will continue to offer a road map of how changes can be “stacked” or “scaffolded” to help support continued growth
- Provider will be intentional to try and create interventions that can take place interpersonally within the community wherever possible
| Questions to Consider | Resistant Client Corner |
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Dating apps are a huge part of the ecosystem that today’s young men have grown up with. They can be a fun pastime and even an effective means to start dating, but think about how to dig deeper if the client presents strong resistance to meeting people in real life. Flirting should be fun for both parties! Consider pushing back on clients looking to “score” rather than making a genuine connection. Ask clients to consider how the object of their attention might feel based on the context and environment where an interaction is taking place. |
When to Check In
First impressions matter in dating! A client may have a lot to offer, but he won’t have a chance to reveal those parts of himself if his attitude or presentation is discouraging potential dates. Consider working with your supervisor to design a customized plan if:
- Factors such as Personal Appearance or Physical Activity might supplement work in this domain
- An existing diagnosis such as social anxiety, autism spectrum disorder, or depression may impact how this client can show up in the context of dating
Week 3: Gaining Confidence
Defining Objectives
How will the client build on their efforts in this domain?
- Client will continue to demonstrate trust in his provider by offering the provider examples of dating relationship challenges and will express openness towards working collaboratively with his provider to address these challenges
- Client will engage with their provider in a additional behavioral change that addresses an identified skill deficit in dating or continue working on the skill or strategy identified in the previous session
- Client will continue to feel motivated to engage in this area of focus both in this session and moving forward
Taking Action
What support will you offer as the client continues to progress?
- Provider will engage in additional behavioral activation interventions that address the challenges that the client has reported
- Provider will affirm and validate the client’s worth as an individual outside of the context of dating or romantic relationships
- Provider will continue to offer a road map of how changes can be “stacked” or “scaffolded” to help support continued growth. Provider will be sure to build on, or remain consistent in previous week(s) interventions
- Provider will be intentional to try and create interventions that can take place interpersonally within the community wherever possible
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When to Check In
Part of putting oneself out there in the dating world is dealing with a rejection, missed connection, or awkward experience. Embrace these opportunities to help your client learn and refine his process and attitudes while checking with a supervisor if:
- A particularly negative experience has shaken the client’s confidence or left him more skeptical or resistant than in previous sessions
- The client consistently reports approaching people he is interested in dating in inappropriate contexts
Week 4: Lessons Learned
Defining Objectives
How will the client apply what he has learned?
- Client will be able to speak to his experience over the course of 4 weeks and indicate measurable or observable progress addressing and overcoming dating challenges
- Client will feel more confident in himself and exhibit a greater self-awareness around his motivation and intentions for dating
- Client will understand how this developed skill improvement can translate into additional areas of internal motivation or connect to the client’s stated treatment goals
Taking Action
How will you help the client to reflect on his progress and plan for the future?
- Provider will continue to engage empathetically with the client, being sure to offer affirmations and validations for efforts made across treatment
- Provider will promote a discussion with the client that consolidates the learning across four weeks in a summative form
- Provider will talk through how the changes made in treatment may be worth continuing, relating back to the broader theme of why the client may have initially sought treatment
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