Resources

Supporting Your Son Through October

Nicole O’Brien, Ph.D., on Stress, Resilience, and Family Bonds

Dr. Nicole O’Brien, CCO (Chief Clinical Officer) Director of Family Therapy & Licensed Marital and Family Therapist
Dr. Nicole O’Brien has calming advice for helping families connect before holiday craziness.

October might be the most honest month of the year: the air sharpens, the school routine is (mostly) set, and life slips into a rhythm (at least for a spooky minute). 

Before the holiday sprint season begins, families have a brief window to check in, recalibrate, and support the young men in their lives. But for many parents, October isn’t all PSL and calm… especially if their sons are struggling with stress, anxiety, or simply finding their place in the world.

To help caregivers make the most of this “pause before the rush,” we turn to Nicole O’Brien, Ph.D., Causeway’s Chief Clinical Officer and resident champion for families. With her signature wisdom, Nicole shares what she wants every parent of a high school or college-aged boy to remember this season.


Spotting the Signs: Why October Matters

According to Nicole, October can be when the cracks begin to show…especially for young men  juggling academics, friendships, independence, and family expectations.
“By now, the frenzy of the new school year has worn off and reality is setting in,” she says. “If your son is suddenly more withdrawn, irritable, or skipping meals and activities you’ve always known him to enjoy…it might be more than just a rough week.”
Where even subtle changes can be a call for help like missed assignments, late nights, trouble sleeping, or a general lack of motivation, Nicole encourages parents to notice these shifts early, and October is the perfect time to gently check in.
“As a parent, you know your son better than anyone,” says Nicole. “If something feels ‘off,’ trust your instincts and start a conversation from a place of curiosity.”

Nurturing Resilience—For Them, and For You

While young men might resist overt “check-ins,” Nicole believes that modeling resilience starts at home. 

“Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish…it’s how you teach your child to do the same,” she says. Simple daily rituals—a morning walk, five minutes of deep breathing, or connecting with your own support system—can make a world of difference.

Nicole adds, “If your son sees you managing stress in healthy ways, you’re modeling a way of handling challenges that will be helpful to him as he continues to mature.”

Encourage your son to get outside, eat regular meals, and try to stick to a sleep routine. And remember: Progress, not perfection, is the goal for everyone this season.


Strengthening Family Bonds—Little Moments Matter

You don’t need grand gestures to make an impact. In fact, Nicole recommends leaning into simple family moments to keep the lines of communication open.
“Your presence is one of the most valuable gifts you can give…anything that gets you side by side can help your son feel connected, even if he doesn’t say much,” she shares. “The point isn’t to fix everything, but to let him know he’s not alone.”

For high schoolers, a low-pressure chat about something your son is interested in can spark small but important changes. For guys in college, a quick text or care package is sometimes all it takes to remind them they’re still in your orbit.


When More Help Is Needed (And How to Find It)

Sometimes, despite our best efforts, boys need extra support. Causeway Collaborative offers coaching, counseling, and parent guidance for families navigating tough seasons. Nicole reminds parents: “Asking for help is not a sign of failure, it’s a sign that you care deeply about your son’s well-being.”

Many families who have reached out for support report stronger relationships, better communication, and renewed confidence, both for their sons and for themselves.


Give Yourself Credit

October may be a pivot point for your son, but it’s also a moment for you to breathe, reflect, and remember that parenting is a marathon, not a sprint. Nicole’s advice? “Show up, keep the conversation going, and give yourself some grace along the way.”


If your family could use more resources this fall (or an extra layer of support from our staff), reach out for a free discovery call with Causeway’s team. You’re not alone…and you don’t have to do this alone, either.

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